Moving people toward their dreams

**aspirations** · #1 (**permalink**) 12-27-2007, 02:58 PM

An Individual Responsibility
Have you ever felt that the majority of your team members expect you to make them successful? Or that you are somehow liable for what they do or don’t do to build the business? Or perhaps you’ve felt guilty when, despite your best efforts, a team member stumbles, fails, or quits. The truth is you are not alone. The truth is that you honestly can’t control very much outside your own skin, and that your team members are responsible for their own success or failure. Sadly, the truth is also that you may well have set yourself up to have your organization depend too much on you.
Many leaders inadvertently mistake the building of a business for the running of an orphanage. In other words, these leaders are filling their teams with people who depend on them to build their businesses, instead of filling their teams with people who are self-motivated and self-directing.
The reasons for these leaders attracting dependent people cover a whole range of concepts. The reasons don’t really matter; the results do. The good news is you can repair the situation by making some important changes in the way you view and lead your team.
Weaning The Dependents
Many leaders recruit people and then try to make them successful. That’s an impossible and frustrating task. The result is that you build an orphanage of resentful people, rather than a team of effective business partners. What makes the difference? Personal responsibility — both theirs and yours. As a leader, it’s your responsibility to lead, not to participate in mass confusion. Your role is to create an environment where those who want to succeed have the tools to do it. To become the leader who brings leadership to your team, you must:
1. Listen to people’s behavior as well as their words. The true essence of any person is revealed through their behavior, not their words. Hear what people say, but study what they do.
2. Detach from the outcome. What your team member does with her business is out of the realm of your control. Certainly you can guide and coach her on her journey, but whether she arrives at the destination is up to her.
3. Empower yourself with leadership skills and experience. In truth, you can’t lead another person past the point where you are (i.e. your teachings are limited to what you know, so it is extremely important to continuously empower yourself with leadership skills and knowledge). Neither can you lead another unless you have the credibility and skills to do so. The truth is that most people respect the scar tissue of a veteran more than paper on an “I love me” wall.
4. Always speak the truth. You can’t help people by playing games. You cannot care about being liked; you must always be honest with what is or is not.
5. Develop people; don’t drag those who don’t want to grow. This is so important. You spend too much time begging people to “do it,” rather than cutting them lose and working with those who are committed to experiencing their dream.
6. Emotionally don’t cross the line. You offer people an opportunity to live their dream; you are not adopting them. If you adopt them, you have crossed the line; if you adopt them, they will make you the reason they didn’t. The line is drawn; this is a business, not an orphanage.
7. Recruit people who emotionally like your story and mentally want to know more. Does it make sense when I say you are a storyteller? Recruiting is about telling your story and finding those who are emotionally ready to listen and mentally ready to take the risk to live life larger than they are presently.
Building your business is not about finding lots of people; it is about recruiting the right people who are inspired by your success story and want to write their own.
Today’s Actions for Ending Dependence
• Accept that you cannot be responsible for anyone else’s success.
• Review your presentations and remove any intimation that you will do anything for a team member beyond training them and modeling success for them.
• If you have a team member who is dependent on you, have a candid, truthful conversation with them to determine if you have met your obligation of training them. If you have, give them a recipe for success and invite them to call you when they have implemented your training and want more.

**amanda0619** · #2 (**permalink**) 12-28-2007, 03:26 AM

learn something from it,

**PKolev** · #3 (**permalink**) 01-26-2008, 07:14 PM

Very good !

**gentlehorizons** · #4 (**permalink**) 01-28-2008, 11:51 PM

This is so true. In my downline team of more than 1,056 members, its funny to note that my original frontline team quit two years ago. My income comes from those self motivated and self-starting entrepreneurs who joined my team...

**Govee** · #5 (**permalink**) 02-04-2008, 05:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by amanda0619

learn something from it,

Very much informative. i found few of my mistakes from your view
Thanks.

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Moving people toward their dreams

Moving people toward their dreams

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